July102009
Truth, V. 2
There is not a lot that is not going well in my life right now. Some major upheavals, some minor disappointments, some stasis, not knowing what to do next. And sometimes, all of that makes me really sad. Write it anonymously on the internet really sad. But the thing is, none of these hiccups are in and of themselves bad things. I have left a relationship that was not good for exploring life as a single woman (for the first time since COLLEGE, y’all). I have left friendships that left me feeling helpless and lonely for more time to myself and time to explore other people. I have stayed in a city that can feel like a high school reunion gone wrong for strong family connections, and dinner with my mom on random Thursday nights. It’s ok to feel lost sometimes. The truth is that, often, I am lonely. There are people missing from my life that once filled big spaces. It’s ok to feel overwhelmed at how much work I have to do to get from here to the life I want. It is not ok to whine. And from this starting place of not a whole lot, there is only possibility from here. Today is for being excited about seeing my favorite band tonight. Today is about writing the rest of these press releases. Today is about being mindful of what I have and passionate about what I want. Today is about being unafraid of the steps to get there, and trusting that I will.
